


now he's so devoid of colour

by malumkisses



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Friends to Lovers, I JUST NOTICED THAT IN LIKE EVERY SCENARIO IN THE BEGINNING CALUM CRIES, IF YOU KNOW WHAT HALSEY SONG THIS IS SORTA BASED ON I PRAISE THE FUCK OUTTA YOU, M/M, MY POOR CHILD, My First Work, SO MUCH ANGST BYE, but hes not, but im complete malum trash, dont cry ples theres a happy ending, honestly this sucks, i got this idea when i was listening to halsey, michael rlly luvs cal, not edited at all whoops, you think calums gonna be the really sad one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-31
Updated: 2015-08-31
Packaged: 2018-04-18 07:10:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4696943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/malumkisses/pseuds/malumkisses
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>everything was blue and then it started to turn gray.</p>
            </blockquote>





	now he's so devoid of colour

**Author's Note:**

> hi, hey, hello. so this is my first work like on any website ever so ive never done it before?? so yeah this is probably hella shiity but aye whatevs.
> 
> hmu on tumblr @/ saturatedsunmike & on ig @/lucashtons + @/kennadiemillss

Blue was the colour of the sweater Michael was wearing on the day he met Calum. He remembered this because he also remembered that sweater being his absolute favourite and it was hard for him to forget how it was totally ruined by white paint being spilled down the front by a boy he had never met before during art in year 1. Especially if he happened to be very cute.

"I'm so sorry!" the boy had shrieked in a frightened voice. He was so scared because oh no, he just ruined a boys sweater and even though it was an accident he was utterly terrified of the teacher finding out and scolding him. It scared him so much that tears started welling up in his eyes and then that scared Michael because why was this cute boy crying, it wasn't a big deal.

"Hey. Hey, don't cry please, it's okay I'm not mad or anything!" he exclaimed trying to calm him down before he actually DID start to cry and catch the teachers attention. But nothing he said seemed to work and he looked like he legitimately saw a ghost. That was, until Michael left him to go up to the teacher and tell her himself that he was being careless and had spilt it on himself, asking to go to the bathroom to clean up. As the teacher sent him off he turned around and smiled shyly at the boy before he left the room in a hurry. That day at lunch, he went up to talk to him and that's when Michael discovered his name was Calum. He really liked that name.

Blue was the colour of the swing set that him and Calum were playing on 3 years later in Calum's backyard. It had become a tradition between the two, that every day after school since the paint accident to go to the swings and just talk because of the fact that they didn't get to see that much of each other in actual school since they had been in separate classes a few times.

They were having a contest to see who could swing the highest when all of a sudden Calum was completely airborne, landing painfully a few feet away.

And he tried, he tried so hard not to scream in pain because Michael was watching and he didn't want to embarrass himself in front of his best friend but he just couldn't because his arm hurt so bad and he didn't know why.

"Calum, oh my god, Cal are you okay?! Are you hurt, show me where I'll make it better, I promise!" Michael had said in a panic as he rushed to Calum's side from the swings.

"My- my arm mikey, my arm, it hurts so bad." Calum had choked out from suppressed sobs and clenched teeth. Michael gently grabbed the tan boys arm examining it, listening to Calum hissing in pain as he tried to turn it slightly. "Oh god Cal, I-I think it's broken." Michael said in a panicked whispeer, because having his best friend basically crying in his arms scared him to death and it made him want to cry because he didn't really know what to do. That was, until it dawned on him. When ever he was in pain, his mom would kiss where it hurt to make him feel better. So what would be the difference now? With that thought, he swiftly brought Calums arm to his lips and pressed soft little kisses to his skin. And in all honesty, he didn't know if it was working until he looked up through the hair falling into his face to look at Calum and see that he didn't seem to be in much pain anymore. He continued until Joy had came rushing out of the house after hearing her sons cries beforehand.

It was the next day that Michael saw Calum again after the ambulance was called and he was taken away from him. It turns out Calums arm was broken so he had to get it examined and a cast put on. Michael was the first one to sign it. "Feel better soon Callie. I hope my kisses made you feel better -Mikey"

Blue was the colour of the nail polish Michael noticed applied on Calums nails when he showed up for math one day in year 8. It had kind of surprised Michael because Calum wasn't one to do anything that made him stand out, especially with a group of boys up his ass, picking on him 24/7. 

"What's that?" Michael asked looking at Calums hands with furrowed brows. "Oh that?" Calum replied looking down at them as well. "Mali was bored the other night so I let her paint them. I guess I just forgot to take it off. Why do you ask?" 

Michael really didn't have a response so he just shrugged his shoulders and turned to the front as the teacher walked in to start the lesson.

Later that day his shoulders were soaked with Calums tears as he hid his face into Michael. The boys that tormented him had noticed his nails and gave him a hard time all day about it. Calum didn't say anything until he walked up to Michael after school. "Its not fair Mikey." he mumbled. "I just wanna be pretty." 

The sentence was so quiet that Michael didn't think he was supposed to hear it, but he had. He grabbed the crying boys face in his hands gently and looked at him. 

"I thought you said Mali put that on you Cal." It was silent until he got a response. "Yes, because I asked her to. I just wanna be pretty. I just want people to think I'm pretty."

"I already do" MIchael said calmly. 

That was the day he got his first kiss.

Blue was the colour of the blanket on Michaels bed which the two boys were sprawled on eating pizza and sharing small kisses. It had been 3 years since the nail polish incident and 2 years since they had officially become a thing and Michael was just so in love it was crazy. 

"So." Michael said suddenly causing Calum to look up from his phone. "The bullies. They haven't been bothering you at all lately, have they? Because if theyre causing anything Cal, I swear I'll actual kill them. I don't want you to get sad again because I don't want you to-"

He was cut off by Calums lips connecting with his, relaxing him to an extent. Calum always relaxed him.

"Calm down Mikey. Everything's fine. I'm fine. They haven't done anything lately so I think that's a good thing." the boy smiled at him. Michael breathed a sigh of relieve. "Okay." he whispered. "Just checking." Calum smiled at him. 

"Love you Mike."  
"Love you too baby." he said back.

And then that's when everything stopped being blue to Michael and gray all started being noticeable to Calum.

Gray was the colour of what Michael felt inside and it was so clear to Calum, because what could you feel when you and your boyfriend were the most hated people at their highschool? The day Calum had told Michael the bullying was finally dying down was the same week it all started again, directed at both of the boys this time. And yeah, a few harsh things were thrown at Michael from time to time back then but not to the extent that it was towards Calum. And besides that, Michael could take it. Now it was like the tables had completely turned.

" baby I know its hard." Calum whispered with his face pressed into Michaels chest one night when he thought he was asleep. "But I know youre gonna be okay. Your gonna be just fine, I know it." And with that Calum grabbed Michaels wrist, rubbing his thumb soothingly against the red marred lines that resided there. "Youre gonna be fine." he whispered once again before falling asleep, only this time it sounded like it was something he was trying to convince himself. Like he didn't entirely believe it. And when Michael heard that, it really hurt. Because it was the same exact thing he tried to convince himself.

"Yeah." he mumbled. "Just fine."

Gray was the colour of what it seemed to Calum that Michaels eyes were turning.

They used to be such a beautiful, bright green, so full of life. And don't get Calum wrong, they were beautiful because they were Michaels and everything about him was beautiful. They were just more-dull. Almost dead looking in a way.

There was no more sparkle. 

Gray was the colour Michael physically looked like he was turning. His sadness was just visibly getting worse and worse and it didn't only take a toll on him, but Calum as well. Because no matter how many kisses or cuddles or the amount of times he told Michael he fucking loved him, it didn't seem to make him feel better and that kind of stung because when it was the other way around and Michael was the one saying I love you and kissing him it always made Calum feel better. Michael always made him feel okay again.

Gray was the only colour Calum could think of when he found Michael lying cold on the bathroom floor, with little will power to keep his eyes open. Well gray and red like the red all over the fucking floor from Michaels wrists. An ambulance was already on the way but it didn't seem like it would get there in time and Calum was actually screaming, just like he did all those years ago when he broke his arm. Only this time it was Michael in HIS arms and he honestly thought that it was the last time he would ever be in them.

"Michael please, please Michael don't close your eyes, listen to me, just listen, fucking listen.' he choked out from his sobs.  
" MIchael I love you so fucking much, so, so much you'll never know. You're everything to me, okay, you're everything and if you leave me I honestly don't think I'll be able to live a day without you. I can't Mike, I just can't. Please, don't leave me. Not yet. Not like this. MIchael please just stay awake." he sobbed. "I fucking love you Mike and you haven't said it back in awhile so I don't know if you love me anymore but I love YOU and I ju-"

"I love you ." Michael said weakly lifting his red arm to wipe the hair out of his boyfriends eyes, "Don't you ever forget it."

And Calum was the last thing Michael saw before the faint sound of sirens completely faded away from him and everything turned black.

\----------  
The first thing Michael saw when he woke up was blue. Just blue.

It was the colour of the ceiling in a unfamiliar room that he had never been in. As his eyes adjusted and he looked at his surroundings he realized that it was a hospital room and as he looked the other way he saw Calum asleep in a chair, soft snores escaping him. 

And seeing him there, just seeing Calum waiting, waiting for him to wake up after everything that had happened made him realize how in love he was. And that was probably the first time Michael genuinely smiled in almost a year.


End file.
